Saturday, May 14
I need a rainy day in an endless summer, a pocket full of stars...
Linda recently asked me this great question: "Do you have an empathy with the sky and clouds, as they appear quite frequently in your pieces on [Creative Tuesdays]?" Yes, I do indeed have an affinity with clouds, the sky...and stars! Living in big-sky Colorado, we enjoy the most incredible cloud formations, sunsets/sunrises, night skies, etc. As I wrote in my portfolio's bio, they really are signs of hope and the miraculous to me:
"And, whenever needing that extra lift, I can simply look up... to those magnificent clouds forming off the Rockies, reminding me that I'm playing a tiny yet crucial part in this curious and gloriously complex designed world of dotty wonder."
When at my loneliest and, consequentially, lowest point years ago, I would often gaze at the expanse, the glorious changes above me, tossing up endless prayers and sorrows. While my faith was severely shaken, there was no way to deny the vastness of life and creation, and in that was a small reminder that so much is a matter of perspective. I am only part of the equation. There is hope out there, even when we don't feel or see it!
As it was, this post's headline (part of a song, actually) was my heart's longing. While the promises held onto never materialized as longed for, I still had family responsibilities! I had to press on, as hard as it was, often not sure if I even could. And, here I am, 7 years later, in a life never imagined yet wondrous all the same. I have an amazing, loving wife; beautiful, incredible children; an ongoing continued career, and a legacy to build.
New people of different stripes come into our life and with these, we have opportunities to love anew, grow, etc. And, of course, I have a best friend who not only enjoys the exact same things as I but who's also creative. Wow. Talk about "stars!" That's how I sometimes feel in this crazy adventure called life. It's sobering. Life's taught me humility; that not only is it OK not having all the answers, it's actually quite liberating, mysterious and magical. When you've faced your greatest fears, you are not only broken then redefined, changed, emboldened and strengthened, you come to more fully appreciate with perspective, that one closed door offers another opening.
So, I'm hoping for and expecting my own pocket full of stars. How about you?